Success and Failure are Equal

This past Saturday, our stake had its annual women's conference.  The conference started with a big group devotional and musical number, and then we separated out to classes.  Seven different 45-minute classes were offered, but there was only time to attend three.  My first choice class was a parenting class taught by a licensed professional counselor from a neighboring stake.  I tend to gravitate to classes of this nature because these professionals often have a few extra tools in their tool belt for understanding human nature.

I was not disappointed in my choice; his class was exceptionally informative and enlightening.  Before the class started, he drew a large 3 x 3 block chart on the chalkboard with a different short phrases in each block.  Each short phrase operated as a conversation starter; as his audience, we chose those topics that seemed the most interesting, and then he discussed the concepts behind the statements.

"Success and failure are equal" was one of his nine short phrases.  I love the concept.  Essentially, it is this: family life is all about growth, not success or failure.  We are here on earth to learn and improve.  We win some, we loose some.  Ultimately, our attitude should be the same, no matter the outcome:

"You succeeded--great--what did you learn?"  
"You failed--great--what did you learn?   

Success and failure are the same.  In either case, we use the experience--positive or negative--as a springboard for further learning.  He pointed out that the amplification of either success or failure can move us into Satan's territory.  The amplification of success is pride.  The amplification of failure is worthlessness.  On the other hand, if you cultivate a culture of learning and growth in your family, humility is the dominant virtue.  I see this principle at work in the parable of the talents (Matthew 25:14-30).  The master was pleased with effort, not success or failure.  The goal is growth.