I talked to Mom on Sunday about Grandma Hoke's memorial service, which I was not able to attend. As part of the service each person who felt comfortable doing so could share a good memory of her and then place a yellow rose (her favorite flower) on the stand. I want to record here some of my yellow rose memories.
One consistently memorable thing I remember about her is that in any letter or birthday card she sent she always began it, "Hi sweetie..." I have always liked pet names or nicknames, and even though they may be generic, they are still endearing titles of affection. Perhaps all the grandchildren were greeted with this same title; it doesn't diminish its significance for me.
On my eighth birthday I received a package from Grandma Hoke. I still remember the hot run out to the mailbox in bare feet to find it. She recognized it was a important milestone for me, though she may not have understood all the reasons. She sent me a little Precious Moments plush doll with a birthday cake in her hands and a card wishing me the best on my "special day."
At BYU one birthday, (sophomore year perhaps?) she send me some fancy custom-made cookies shaped and decorated like flowers. On another birthday she sent a collection of soup and muffin mixes.
Our Christmases in the recent past have been fun because of the thoughtful gifts Grandma sent. One year all the girls received different types of animal slippers (monkey, pig, elephant, kitten...etc.) Another year all the girls received pajamas.
Grandma supported me in my achievements even though we rarely ever lived near enough to make her visits very convenient. She came to Iowa to attend my high school graduation and we took old fashioned vintage pictures just for fun (Grandma, mom, Emily, and me). She also attended my college graduation and gave me a beautiful cross-stitched and custom framed design commemorating my achievement. Her gift hangs on my wall in the front room of my apartment.
In January of 2000 I went up to visit her over a long weekend while at BYU and recorded her life history. How grateful I am that I did that! It has since been transcribed and distributed and though not terribly detailed, is a record, nonetheless, and a blessing to have.
Though the last years of her life were often discouraging and painful, they served to help bring together my mom, my aunts, and my grandma. I am grateful that her cancer provided that opportunity for their relationship to be rebuilt.